Thursday, December 25

Save me.

I'm addicted to ________?

Am I just ______ craving

or do I really want ______ ?

I wish that things would stay the way it was in June '06.
Maybe god has other plans.
But are you for real ?

Wednesday, December 24

Adreen-aline rush

I can't wait for another road trip.
I can't wait for jamming session.
I can't wait to go back to the jungle?
I can't wait to see Firah. God knows how much i miss her.
I can't wait to finish this project.
I can't wait to feel I have too much time to spend untill i finish the whole season of Gosip Girl and 90210.
I can't wait to become a student again and be stressed with FYP?
I can't wait to blow up my money on nice clothes as if i don't have enough.
I can't wait to be at the beaches.
I can't wait to have my own car.
I can't wait......

Thursday, December 18


This is just insane.
I have to develop a travel system during my internship.Everything is working fine till the ceo's secretary wanted to be in the system's loop workflow.
I was just about to learn new things so that this intern period would be worth 8 months. Then my supervisor had to pass the project to another intern and I had to figure things out with the travel system.
It wasn't easy as it sounds like. After one error lead to another error. Fix the codes and redundant things which made me literally sick and tired.
Untill today, I am still fixing the whole system.It has been a few weeks.Fuck. Those bloody end user kept on pressuring me. The dumbest part is .. when I test the system, they complain. Idiots. How am I suppose to know the system is perfect for usage if I don't test it.
Being a developer is much of a headache.But being a developer who is an Internship student, is cruel.

owh baby, its a cruel world.

Wednesday, December 17

Excuse me.

Saya rindu di saat dahulu kala di mana saya berada di bawah cahaya lampu terang bendenrang dan tak nampak keys mana yang saya tekan diikuti dengan hati yang terlampau berdebar2 dan kaku di atas lantai kayu.

Saya juga rindu gelak ketawa tekanan setelah menyedari saya bermain not yang silap dan mengikut rentak drum di dalam sebuah bilik yang kecil dan kalis bising.

jadi.. apa kata kita bermain muzik lagi ?

Tuesday, December 16


If there is another world I would want to live in, it would never be this world.
Since this world is falling apart already. It would be nice to think that disappearing is an option.

I wish that I was a witch. But witch craft is against my religion and it is only imaginary.

Friday, December 12

tentang cerita sengal

Panic and sengal.

My cubicle table is missing something after I came back from lunch. Something BIG!
..... mana laptop ku pergi??!! ni mesti keje ariff. cis!
So i asked ariff , ' mana my laptop ha? ' and with his blur and aku innocent expression he said ' tak tahu. tak kan kene curi. Pak Pin kot '. We refer our boss as Pak Pin.

We checked through his glass office. Haaa... there it is. on his table! Panic again.. mampus kene membebel ngan orang tua tu. huhu...

It is my fault. I know. I should have locked my laptop before i disappear. He did warned us before (a very long time way before we moved to a new office) to lock our laptop all the time or else he'll rampas. Macam pengawas sekolah la...' Jangan bawak handphone pegi sekolah. Nanti kami akan rampas' hahaha.

The thing is,when we moved to this new office I lost my laptop lock and didn't bother to lock my laptop pon. hurm... tu la ignorant and degil lagi. padan muka.

Because I was being so sengal, ariff and me figured out just get another laptop lock in the store room and pretend that i left the key at home. Unfortunately the store room at my level was locked. We went upstairs to find a laptop lock. Cari cam gila.. dalam store la , kat work bench la. Last2 there was one in a box near the work bench. Lama kot cari. Takut je Pak Pin dah balik.

Then I sneaked in the office because I wouldn't want to bump in to him with the laptop lock in my hands. I waited kinda lama for Pak Pin to come back. At last I got my laptop back. Berlakon innocent, buat muka comel, and cakap sorry dalam tone suara perempuan melayu terakhir cut his membebel :P

Teka teki terjawab. bukan encik ariff yang bawak sorok tetapi encik ariffin.

p/s: We call him Pak Pin because his name is Ariffin and he does lecture his staff alot cam bapak orang.


Another chapter ended. I just have to end it.
I do love him so much but we can't go on not understanding each other and we just don't get along like peanut butter and jelly. I don't hate him.

This time is no turning back. I know.. cam sedih gile to let go but I been sad and depressed with this relationship lately. Probably we're not for each other. I prayed asking if he was the one just let it stay. I was too numb to cry. I felt like being alone at this moment. This relationship made me more independent.

Long distance break up. I didnt get to see him or give a hug. I won't give back his stuff. Seeing us parting is the saddest thing right now. I need to be strong. I am not ready to open myself to anyone yet. Being alone makes me happy at the moment. So I prefer to stay that way. Gosh it is hard when you don't hate the person and you love that person. I'll take is as growing pains.

Good things do end.

p/s: the building cleaner cleaning the building window at the office pantry does amuse me during breakfast.

Thursday, December 11

Cantik nya.

I have this habit of adoring beautiful things. Which includes beautiful girls. I know it sounded so gay. Owh i am not gay. When i spot a beautiful girl, i'd stare and adore. I'll go ' lawa nye awak... rasa cm nk pg depan awak dan ckp awak ni lawa , saya suka tengok '. Bt I am shy as if I bumped into a really cute guy and wanted to smile but i couldn't so i just look down.

I guess that is why I can get along with my guy friends.A few days back me n my guy friend spotted this babe. Tak sexy pon. But to us she is lawa. Pleasant to look at. I refused to change seats with him because i get the best view. hahaha.. But i find it hard to spot beautiful ladies in the lrt. If i do spot one it would probably make my day.. owh no i am so gay.

p/s : saya masih straight. Saya adore Silver dalam 90210.

Wednesday, December 10

The drinks we drank last night.

I shall be strong.
Yes, its just the wind that makes me cry.

Monday, December 1

Tentang cookies and cupcakes.

The kitchen's a mess.
The cupcakes are cute.
The cookies were super delicious with extra choc chips. yum!

Shared with noin's cute bed pods and some bangles.

Plain jane sells faster than choc lover.People get excited to hand pick cookie in the cookie jar

The cookie maker a.k.a my adik and her bff .

I bought a handbag and a cardigan :p
Adik didn't bought anything but spent on desserts. So typical of her.

Thursday, November 27

tentang make up

A really girlish post isn't it?

Yesterday was my sister's (yuni) birthday. My parents would love to spend 1000++ for a good slr for her present. But unfortunately they couldn't find one.
So, to make it up to her, my mum bought her one set of beneffit make up that cost around 300 ++. She always wanted it. She's 14 by the way.
While watching this 'lembut guy' applying blusher, lipgloss and what so ever on her face, my mind floated somewhere else...

I am 21. Still new in this make up thingy. I don't even own a make up base? foundation? lipgloss? (lipgloss n rouge pot is different). Ok, I don't own a complete set of make up. And even guys apply make up wayyyyy better than me. Transforming yuni's face with pimples and scars into jenny humpfrey. I can't even make my skin looked like baby bum.

I remembered when i was 14. Lipbalm whaat?

How advance high school kids today. Well, she was delighted. She's been collecting those benefit catalogue since forever. Its a 3 piece set of benetint, dandelion and ape tah satu lg tu its in a yellow ish tube.

And it came to my mind.. i LOVE natural beauty the most... jealousy? tak kot.

Monday, November 24

The day I couldn't meet you.

I was so frustrated....

Owh why...

I don't know to call this selfish or its my responsibility.

yesterday (sunday),
I woke up really early and did every single thing you listed even did extra chores, mum still won't let me go.
Mum's reason is.. she can't count on adik. She needed me to help so that she can go gossipping and chatting with you cousin.
But I haven't met him in months and another 8 months to go not knowing if i could see him again.
This is TOUTURING me.
But still, if I wasn't there to help, it still didn't make any different.
You made me felt so sorry for myself for being too obedient.
Now I'll never know when..
We will just walk around hands in hands
We will talk over a cup of coffee
We will explore shops and drool about things we can't afford (lain kot doing it online)
We will dine at fancy places or any thing we never tried

I miss you the most. I WISHED i could spend the whole day with you. Should have been yesterday. Its just sad.

Thursday, November 20

Lola the kancil.

She has be friends with me since i was in my high school years.

She was my mum's but i named her Lola because of her lilac body.

Its been years with Lola.. during rich or poor, happy or sad.

She even followed me when i took my SPM results and heard tears of disappointment from me.

Its gonna be my final year in a two months.

I need a car. I need to move around a lot.

So, Lola comes to Uni with me for my final year.

From now on, I will take care of Lola and give her all the love in this world! (ermm .. corny nye aku.) bf x de nxt sem. so perlu sayang Lola banyak2.


Wednesday, November 19

Just to kill time

I was tagged by zizi. Thanks for knowing how bored i am here :D

Starting time : 11:32

Name : Adreen.

Sisters : Ayuni.

Brothers : 0

Shoe size : five

Height : 5 feet

Where do you live : Section 9 shah alam

Have you ever...
Been on a plane : Yup.

Swam in the ocean : swam a little bit further from the shore? yes.

Fallen asleep at school :obviously yes

Broken someone’s heart : maybe

Fell off your chair : owh never.

Sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call : i guess so.

Saved e-mails : only important ones

What is your room like : under construction

What’s right beside you: phones. 2 of them. one is not mine tho.

What is the last thing you ate : pecan and bananas

Chicken pox : are itchy and leaves scars. had those when i was 4.

Sore throat : can be prevented by drinking warm water daily and no screaming.

Stitches : none

Broken nose : never

Do you believe in love at first sight : nope. only in movies

Like picnics : would love to.

Who is the person...
You last danced with : my sister

Who last made you smile : kak sue.

You last yelled at : Brownie

Today did you…
Talk to someone you like : yeap.. ina.

Kiss anyone : hehee *blush*

Get sick : Not yet

Talk to an ex : prefer to avoid

Miss someone : almost everyone whose been missing for a while.

Who do you really hate: no one i can think of

Do you like your hand-writing : not at all

Are your toe nails painted : nope

Whose bed other than yours would you rather sleep in: ina's or iylia's bed.

What color shirt are you wearing now : purple

Are you a friendly person : in front certain people?

Do you have any pets : Brownie, the gedik cat

Do you sleep with the TV on : nope

What are you doing right now : this tag thinggy

Can you handle the truth : depends

Are you closer to your mother or father : Dad

Do you eat healthy : i guess so.

Do you still have pictures of you & your ex : erm.. yes. i think. maybe somewhere i couldn't find

If you’re having a bad day, who are you most likely to go to : Mum

Are you loud or quiet most of the time : hurmm.. loud.

Are you confident : Some times

5 things I was doing 10 years ago:
  • I was staying in Subang Jaya
  • I wasn't girlish at all
  • My best friend and i would do artsy stuffs and exchange with each other
  • I was fat because i ate a lot of fatty things
  • ....

5 things I would do if I were a billionaire:
  • Build a lovely house
  • Get a jet plane
  • Open wedding boutiques and couture houses
  • Build my parents a lovely house
  • Have a vacation in space

5 of my bad habits:
  • Hot tempered
  • Easily lose confident
  • Irrational sometimes
  • Paranoid
  • .....

5 places I’ve lived:
  • Leeds, Uk
  • Subang Jaya
  • Shah Alam
  • Perak (does uni counts?)
  • ??

5 People I am tagging:
  • Ina
  • Tasha
  • Iylia
  • Noin
  • Kak sue

Can't take my eyes off you

Owh inananana,
Why do you have to show me all those lovely bags....
I know we'll eventually will fall in love with these beauties
Jual beribu2 bulu ketiak pon belum tentu dapat.

Coach Hamptons leather. I love!

Friday, November 14

Gila Gula

I been such a hypocrite lately.

I'm sorry tummy for hurting your feelings.

I (my tummy) crave for...









I been avoiding these stuffs since the gym post.

Adreen sila control makan.. kamu kene makan banyak sayur dan buah.

But I'm craving like crazy.
owh bole jadi gila. dah la semua bende dekat dan mudah dapat.
I'm not in utp for crying out loud.

Wednesday, November 12

Hey! don't be rude.

The server was down around 3pm yesterday. So everyone couldn't do their work. Including me.

There was this staff, lets name her L. She came banging at this intern's desk. Lets name him E.

L: Eyh, where's the internet? I cannot do my work. I have tonns of work to do now. Tell me how
am i suppose to do my work? (in an angry tone)
E: We're sorry for that but the server is down now.
L: Ya la i know la. But so many people cannot do their work now. I also cannot do my work. Its
disturbing you know.
E: But it will be for a while. Its going to be fine later. Don't worry. They are checking the server.
L: Later? I don't have time to wait. I have work to do now.
E: Its just not you. I also have work to do.
L: ...(went off)

So that was how the conversation goes (kinda coz i can't remember the exact words). Anyway, my cubicle is next to E's.

To L, you are very rude. We know we are interns but it does not mean you can be rude to us.

In the end,
Me and E went to the server room and stayed for a while to escape angry staffs. hehe.

Sorry peeps. Server was down for an hour. Doesn't affect that much aite?

Kecoh la L. Don't make a big fuss out of it bitch. :)

Monday, November 10

can i post twice a day?

isn't her voice just wonderful? actually i feel that way at the moment. no, i'm not letting anyone go. i'm just sad.


i got bangs!
i'll post a picture if i ever take one.

Thursday, November 6

Somewhere over the rainbow

I saw a full arched rainbow
after a drizzling morning.
It reminded me of My Little Pony.

Tuesday, November 4

To someone that matters.

Today i feel calm like a baby sleeping in a cradle.

Yesterday was just a few wet pages of a paperback novel.

Throw all the anger, goldfish eyes and the black heart in a jar.

Today is a new day like this post.

I'll change if that only makes you want to call me your sister and be proud of it.

I'm sorry for being too young at heart.

Monday, November 3

Soalan2 yang perlu dijawab hari ni

I was tagged by Fithri Natasha Merissa Kartika Ishak.

1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
Burn him like he burn my heart. hahaha. x la. just let it be and forget.

2. If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?
Travel all around the world.

3. If you are the opposite gender, what would you do?
I'd try to pee in a bottle. ha ha

4. What would you do with a billion dollars?
Big house and big car is overrated kan? So, i'll by myself an island and build a nice resort.
grow money. more money.

5. Will you fall in love with your friend?

6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
love myself.

7. How long do you intend to wait for someone you really love?
I don't know.

8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
dang!! melepas. nothing.

9. Have u ever been labeled as a snatcher?
once. but i didn't snatch. its more like bermadu. eww.

10. What takes you down the fastest?
anything got to do with feeling guilty to my mum n dad.

11. How would you see yourself in ten years time?
I'd be 31. Not married. Shoppaholic. A wedding planner. Travel alot.

12. What do you really want at the moment of responding to this tag?

13. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
Bising, annoying, baik, a good listener. saya sayang kamu macam mana pon cik tasha.

14. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor?
Can i skip this one?

15. What's the first thing you do when you wake up today?
Tarik selimut tido balik and set snooze 9 minit kemudian.

16. Would you give all in a relationship?
Define all. Not really. I'd be stupid to lose my dignity for it.

17. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?
hurm. me and you.

18. Would you forgive and forget no matter how horrible a thing the someone has done?
yes. I do forgive and forget. Even god forgives.

19. What is your feeling rite now?
I don't know. I was happy. Then I'm annoyed. so its happily annoyed.

I am tagging:

kak sue

and anyone nk buat.

Thursday, October 30

ape kaitan pengkid dengan lagu lucky ?

I was standing at my locker and about to get undressed at the ladies locker room after working out at the gym then a guy came in.


But weird enough i wasn't as surprised as the chinese lady beside me who was just in her towel.

He was wearing baju melayu and sampin because it was their wear traditional clothes day.

It turns out to be that another chinese lady lost her locker keys. So he helped to break the padlock.

And he wasn't a he but a she.

Well, the soft konon macho voice and barely there boobs don't lie.

Today, as any ordinary day my dad drove me to the train station.

Everytime the song lucky by Jason Mraz and Colby Caillat was on the radio, he'd turn the volume louder.

It didn't happen once but a few times i notice.

He told me that my sister's best friend who is a guy likes this song.

But i personally thinks he liked it too.

Aww so cute papa.


Pengkid dengan lagu lucky tak ada kaitan pon.

Wednesday, October 29


I miss eating chocolate and peanut butter waffles behind V5K with you.

I miss ordering milo tabur on cold exam nights from you.

I miss our study sessions that ended up as conteng2 tangan session.

I miss chocolate and peanut butter waffles, milo tabur (yang x kedekut milo), study and you.

8 months more :(

Friday, October 24


Tear drops are beautiful
aren't they?

Thursday, October 23


Kau tinggi lampai, aku hanya setaraf dengan jantung kau

Kau bermain gitar, aku bermain keyboard

Kau sokong Arsenal, aku memang tak sokong mana2

Kau suka makan nasi , aku masih bole hidup tanpa nasi

Kau suka white coffee ais, aku suka milo tabur

Kau suka usha gadgets di , aku suka usha baju2 di blogs

Kau suka arctic monkeys, aku suka incubus (tapi kau jugak pengaruh aku dengan local indie music)

Kau suka pendam perasaan, aku suka mengekspreskan perasaan

Kau tak suka makanan manis, aku suka cupcake, ice cream dan chocolate

Kau tak suka aku cakap "boo hoo", aku tak suka kau akhirkan sentence ngan 'r' cth: "apa rr"
( cam marah je)

Kau pakai body spray, aku pakai perfume

Kau dan aku suka melukis

Kau dan aku hot tempered (bukan hot bersama2)

Kau dan aku suka bershopping

Kau dan aku suka bergusti

Kau dan aku suka pantai

Kau dan aku suka melayan live band

Kau dan aku suka bende cute

Kau dan aku suka menghabiskan masa bersama2 di bawah V5K

Kau dan aku tidak berkereta

Kau dan aku suka 'hug' kalau nak baik2 semula lepas gaduh.

Wednesday, October 22

gemuk itu lawa?

Hari ni kerja saya membaca blog aje.

Semalam kerja saya online window shopping. (but it ended up shopping. owh tak tahannn)
thank you gigi if that jacket was your treat.

Best kan intern.

Because i got bored with my routine so i started gym to get rid all these fats away.Just started yesterday and it was refreshing.

Ye, saya dah gemuk. Kadang2 kalau pakai baju yang cm baby doll cut, some insensetive people will say.. 'u pregnant berapa bulan? ' . The word pregnant, bulat, raksaksa berlemak, gemuk, besar, fat sangat sensetive di gegendang telinga saya jika ditujukan kepada saya. hurm. emo.

Kadang2 saya terpikir penting sangat ke nak jadi kurus cam catwalk model walaupun tinggi mereka 2 kali ganda tinggi saya (itu sudah melampau).

Menyusahkan jugak. Badan saya cam yo-yo (bukan sebab die bulat). Tapi sebab berat badan saya cepat naik dan cepat turun. Haish. susah nak maintain tau!

Tapi.... I want to look good in anything i wear. Doesn't anyone want that?

Nak cantik itu sakit.

So my dearest mummy says.. do not eat fattening food (banyak sayur..etc and kurang carbs) and go to the gym everyday.
Bermula dari semalam, saya transform kepada seekor kambing yang hanya makan sayur di malam hari.

Terharu kerana dia kisahkan saya. Owh saya tak stress. Saya suka gym dan sayur tapi bukan suka nak jadi kambing.

To orang-orang who thought that i'm pregnant or called me raksaksa berlemak,

At least i have booty and jellies to work it out. You skinny little insecure asses.

Tuesday, October 21


I was away from the city.

gigi performing and he was super duper cute. haa~ angau.

He put the pick in my purse and told me not to lose it (again) because it was the pick he used for his first gig and its my pick.

Review for marshmallow (where did the monsters go? )

They improved a lot. way better that their last performance at pool party.

Since now arctic monkeys are overrated, they played cover for

Trying your luck - The Strokes
Naive - The kooks
Take Me out - Franz Ferdinand
Obstacle 1 - Interpol

All mellow down except for Take Me Out.
Front Man Dzul must have sang his veins out to make that brit accent. But it was awesome.
Didn't really hear rhythm during Obstacle 1 but credits to Wan for not being too nervous and enjoyed the stage and crowd.
Hafiz's solo wasn't that bad and improved alot.
And Pdus as usual good drum beats without any shirt on (uuu hotness.. chep, sila jealous :P)

Overall, it was synchronize and there was some chemistry sensed when you guys were performing. This is good for a band. But credits to you guys because you weren't able to practice without a drummer untill the very last minute.

Might have a little lose counts but it was covered by the drums.

You guys were spectacular and I hope to see you guys in future gigs.


Thursday, October 16


Nak guling2 bawah comforter!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The train was stuck due to the heavy rain yesterday. I was late for work.

Ok. Enough complains about the train.

My forms of talking to people.. ym, gtalk... dah gila.

I was online and then i was offline

Made me felt like i was in UTP where the internet sucks.

My tummy isn't feeling so good. It felt like there is this balloon that is about to pop any time.

The smell in this office won't get any better. No matter how many air freshener there is on this table or how often i spray, I still have the same smell on my shirt at the end of the day.

Cik Aries, i can't wait to escape the city and go road trippin' tomorrow. (padahal utp je.)

Friday, October 10

Baju Kurung Cotton

I love!
Its so comfy and free~
Should make or buy more.
Owh I want those with cute cherries!

I was tagged by shira.

The Rules:
- Link to your tagger and post these rules in your blog.
- Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird.
- Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs.
- Let them know they are tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

7 things...

  • I don't like pink. But most of my things are pink. Don't even think about buying me something pink tho i love to tease someone by giving him pink stuff. ha ha

  • I am scared of heights (explains why I am not getting any taller), trapped in small room alone and gory movies but i like to draw sadistic drawings sometimes.

  • I'm attracted to tall, lanky, wavy/ curly haired, glasses wearing guys. ehem!

  • When I was 11 after my mengaji class (with my baju kurung and tudung) my mum always stop by at 7 eleven. Due to the interesting color wrapper I thought it was one of those
    colorful band-aid (i used to collect those a lot that time and put it on my knees) but it turned out to be condom. As a result, I got weird stares from the cashier and people around me.

  • When i feel less confident I'd hunch, always pretend that I'm checking my phone and try to avoid my reflection.

  • The weirdest thing I ate was the dirt in a flower pot (back in Leeds, mum put fresh flowers around the house) when i was one years old. sheesh! I might have thought that was chocolate. Not only dirt, screws as well.

  • I was so jealous of my baby sister because she got so many attention. She was 11 months old back then. I own a train set. You know, one of those trains battery operated. So I took the train with its wheel still moving and put it on her hair. It got stuck there. So she cried and mum had to untangled it. HA HA . That pays for being such an annoying brat. That was then. But now we're close as ever. Still love you yuni!
Ok I have to tag 7 people.

Malas. Anyone nak buat , sile la.

Thursday, October 9


I felt momentum when the train stops.
Owh no. Its not just stop. Its an emergency break.
Thanks to the poles and handles, no one fell to their knees.
Then there was this announcement telling us sorry its an emergency break.

Ok. I was shocked. It felt like a car bumped into a car.

The ktm was surprisingly full like a can of sardine except the water won't have any space to flow in the stinky can of sardine.

Owh god what did i do wrong that i have to take the worst public transport.

Sometimes the lrt door won't open at your stop. And you happen to be at the end of the train with so many obstacles in front.

thinking a way to get to the nearest working door.

I want a car!

Drive to the nearest lrt station. take the train and drive home. see. easy. no more stinky sardine can ktm that moves slower than a siput babi. Rather lrt than ktm.


Tuesday, October 7

i am no super woman

I read noin's blog and did this quiz

Which super hero are you?

So ....
Your results:
You are Supergirl

The Flash
Green Lantern
Wonder Woman
Iron Man
Lean, muscular and feminine.
Honest and a defender of the innocent.

Click here to take the Superhero Personality Test

Sunday, October 5

Indah nya suasana di Hari Raya

When I was 4, I always thought that every festive season (raya and christmas are the only holidays i knew at that age) there would be snow. Yes it was snowing on raya when i was 4.

When I was 7, I didn't dare to hold the bunga api by its metal stick so my uncle had to stick that bunga api in a wood thingy. (tu la nak main tapi takut).

When I was 11, my family used to go beraya to every relatives even distance relatives that i don't know of but not anymore now since most of them are dead.

Recently the duit raya that i get are less than last year and last few years. Probably I'm too old to get some but my 14 year old sister complains that she gets less too this year. Blame the economy or blame her matured looks...ehem matured baju raya? hahahha.

I didn't had that much unforgetful memories of raya coz most of it would be the usual routine especially when we are in mum's home town.

But its been a long while since i last visited my grandparent's grave (dad's parents). Even tho I haven't met them but I just wonder what was it like to have them around. Can't just bring dead people alive.

Maybe i should. They would be happy to know i drop by (if they ever know me). But its miles away .

Owh well,

Selamat Hari Raya & Maaf Zahir Batin.

Kalau ada open house sila la ajak :P

Friday, September 26


Its good bye Kate Moss and hello Aggy or a.k.a Agyness Deyn. She's not one of those typical models that you see on the runway. I don't feel she looked plastic and typical. I adore her hair style and wish i can pull off something like that but too bad my features are not sharp and strong like Aggy's.
She's British (from Failsworth, Great Manchester). At age 16 she started her modeling career. And best of all, she is also involved in music and recently dating with Albert Hammond Jr of The Strokes! She was featured in the single 'Who' by Five o'Clock Heroes. Love her style and boyish but yet sweet face alot. At least now fashion world has something not typical aye?

Here's Five o'Clock Heroes feat. Aggy in Who

Tuesday, September 23

If you are from the 80's

tanda-tanda anda sudah tua

-Berhenti layan gig indie yang penuh dengan kanak2 hingusan menegah
-Selalu membebel macam mak orang (i bet gigi and yuni agree on this )
-Mula kisah tentang penampilan anda dengan serious
-Berkawan dengan orang2 tua
-Menggunakan lebih daripada 3 krim product kecantikkan (better avoid than looking fugly)
-Layan band2 dari zaman 90's
-Tak ada masa yang banyak untuk diri sendiri
-Stress pasal jam or train ramai orang tiap2 hari

Hurm x la tua sangat.. its just 80's babies all grown up.

Monday, September 22

the not so 60's

Yesterday felt like the 60's.

With Beatles on the stereo singing 'I wanna hold your hands' and the whole Beatles album.

A fast food restaurant full with kids (more like my age).

Laughter and chatter.

Burgers, fries and shake.

Me myself looked like a hippie chic (more indie they reckon or 'gadis urban' owh puh-leezee)

But what wasn't so 60's, was me and pdus watching a lil bit of gossip girl on chep's mac book before berbuka.

ha ha ha

Wednesday, September 17

Tuesday, September 16

rindu bangat.

I miss my girls (that includes you gigi) terribly now. You know who you are.

My girls (and gigi) will never make me upset. They are never childish in some sense.

We can be really honest and slumber but still nothing we say to each other hurts a lot (even some people might think its too 'bitchy' too handle).

You girls (and gigi) just get me.. get it? And wouldn't mind that much bout what i blab about because its non-sense.

Here, its kinda different.

Some people just don't accept how pricky i can be sometimes and label me as a 'bitch'.

Which is sad honestly.

I miss my girls and my gigi too.

note: gigi is a guy.

Monday, September 15

owh weekend.

Room make overs are extremely tiring during Ramadhan. We just painted my sister's room purple. My room is a bigger but i already tear my boarders and unscrew whatever it is on the wall.

So now my room looked like an under construction room and it smelled like paint for no reason.

I'm glad everyone's happy with their raya card. Noin, I'll post yours. hehe.

Owh.. the donut with icing that wrote 'happy 21st..' x jadi and it melted. I bet it looked ugly. Sorry syazwan.

Yesterday I planned to get donuts instead of cake for syazwan. And write happy 21st on it. Siap buat icing color blue. Then like x jadi coz the font was big and i wrote on glazed donuts coz it won't stick to sugar coated donuts. huhu..

But I'm happy to surprise him. Thank you so much Ina for helping. Owh it would be jolly good if i was there. Happy to know he liked his pressie.

Wednesday, September 10

kids say the darnest thing

after berbuka at opah's

Papa was smoking outside. Adik sat next to papa.

Adik membelek2 kotak rokok papa. Ade la dalam 6 puntung rokok lagi.And she read out what was written on the box

Adik: The satisfaction of Smoking.hmmm....

Papa:....(sambil menghembus asap rokok cam seorang mafia)

Adik: Papa satisfied ke isap rokok?

Papa: o.0 (acting like nak menyiku kepala adik)

hahahahhahahahhahahah... segal nye adik.

Tuesday, September 9


its a long post.If x nk baca sampai habis pon x pe.

The ball came from far end
Whoosh... I tried to stop it before it gets into the goal.
Yes i did stop it. It hit my palm. Bloody hell. Sakit wooo...

'Ah, sape mamat tuh. Dah la orang baru. Gelabah.'

He teased our goal keeper because its a she.

'Eleh , senang je nak goal. Goal keeper perempuan'

We hated this guy. It was too dark to notice how he looked like.
Oooo nama die Wan. Roomate Najib.

Cam sombong tapi.

But hi je la.. ' hi wan!' (sounded like haiwan. hahahhahaha)
Wazi's birthday.

We suprised him. With some of you semangat with it.

Ina main kejar2 with Wazi (owh ini x bole lupa)..

Some other people were there too.. Najib, Mirul, us girls and.. that new guy Wan.

He seemed friendly. I sat somewhere near him and He was talking and talking.

I observed this guy. Rimed glasses, tall lanky and fair. Kinda like 'ah beng' sekali pandang. Ok la. cute jgk.

Owh camp.

Result ku cm cibaiiii.. n have to go for edu camp. wtf.
Thankfully for Ina, Iylia and Fara for making this camp fun.
Its not as bad as NS (tho i never join NS) kinda boring.
But can mandi sungai. hehe. And I don't fancy jungle tracking.

Not a pampered princess. Too gedik for me.

Eye-candy for me,Iylia and Ina coz some interesting people are in the same camp. hehe

There was this one session we were suppose to write the opposite sex name who is in the camp on a piece paper and fold it and put it in a box (i think)

I wrote.. Iylia wrote... But it got confused. They thought Iylia wrote what i wrote.

So people were whispering. Iylia wrote Syazwan's name. ( but it was actually me )

Somehow i know he had a girlfriend when i was hanging out with Wani (my coursemate) and the guys was there too.

Been wanting to talk to him but i was too shy. Maybe just a crush. I am single and totally available anyway.

So simpan je la hajat tu since he has a gf.
Its been a year.

Somehow Tasha decided to surprise Najib on his birthday.

He was there after a while i didn't really bumped into him.

It put a smile on my face.

He wore braces! so i typed on his Friendster : gigi!

So it went on and on with Friendster testi to kalaoki and wild orchid to ym.
I get to choose this one night.. to go menggila with my seniors yg mmg gila2 or find someone to dine with

I was chatting with kalaoki. So he decided to take me for dinner.

The thing is. He don't have my number.

And I don't have his. Dh on the way tu. huhu.

Called Iylia for his number.

Lepak2 makan ice cream after dinner at v3

Yes I memang serabai lepak that time.

At the v5 gazebo we sat.

Then we laid down. Just plain talking. Imagine that we were star watching


Raffles College of Design or Petronas?

I always wanted to be a fashion designer.
I have another year to go here and this degree I'm taking is just security for me.

I checked out about Raffles fashion designing course.It took my attention.The subjects.
But I wouldn't know if I am creative enough to enter.

Like I have to design a few pieces with explanation for the interview.

Reading about the course makes me super excited. The subjects are way much more interesting than Java or even DCN.

But 2 years and 3 months? full time student. Now, where do I put Petronas?

What if they don't let me go? I know its safe money.But if I insist to leave Petronas for my risky 'angan2' then I'll have to pay them.. a big amount.

Imagine myself drag to work because of the big pay.
As Firah said, If you don't mind working for money then drag yourself to work. Or go with something you are passionate for.

Owh no.I'm so not gonna do IT work.Forget about all the certs. Thank you for internship. No IT work for me please. This is not me.

I think for this time being I should start designing like I used to and bring out my creative-ness (if it will ever come out again).

Imagine.... all the wonderful things I can do with fabric and figure.

Monday, September 8

Iylia and Futsal

Iylia and football can't be separated.

Her obsession with Raul. Just look at the back of her file or even her lappie screen saver. Its Raul!

Not surprised if she could play footie that well.

The girls teamed up, all 6 of us (Ina,me,Tasha,Noin,Iylia,Fara) for futsal. It was the beginning of futsal for girls. We played just before gol and gincu was released.

We didn't had a match between girls but we had it with the guys (Wazi, Mirul and others).

But Iylia was a really good striker. She's a natural.

Despite of how 'ganas' we played we'd always end up having our sweat pants torn here and there. Its always the knee.

And mesti main nak terjatuh tergolek2 or kene rembat kt mana2.

We'd play untill its time for 'sahur'.

Iylia and Tasha both had the same "Call Me"(printed on the butt) sweat pants. I don't really remember if they wore it at the same time. But it kept the guys 'whooing' everytime one of them wore that.

Futsal was also where we first met our bfs or ex-bfs.

Noin and Hair Color

Kerja gila..

Me,Noin and Tasha wanted to color our hair.It was in our first sem foundation and fasting month to be exact.

Tasha went to a cheaper saloon to color her hair purple while me and Noin go searching for a saloon that uses loreal in this place which is kinda like Ipoh's Low Yat.

It was one of those crazy hair color obsession days. I wanted it dark brown with a lil light brown highlight streaks and Noin wanted green (which still makes me wonder why untill today).

We went to this fancy saloon that looked trusted enough.Explained to the hairdresser what we wanted. I thought mine shouldn't be a problem. But the highlights were blond. It was nice when they blow it.

Somehow Noin's hair went owh no! It was green before that hairdresser blew her hair but then it turned sort of blond.

So now we're like two blond bimbos.

Dah la same course. hahahah.. we had to live with it. Going to class wearing hat. Our course mates were wondering why.

Disaster hair color. But Tasha's one turned out to be nice.I wouldn't post pictures coz it looked silly. Innocent nye.

Saturday, September 6

Tasha and swimming pool

This is the girl that stick us all like glue.

Just with her dentyne we became instant friends.

The swimming pool incident

It was 2 am... kaching~ boom! Zuma! This babe was still playing zuma. Its was our first month in UTP. I was lying on the floor feeling bored. Then i told Tasha ' babe, jom swim' and she was like ok! see how lepak this girl is.

So we put on out sweat pants and sweater. We walked all the way to the pool. It was far. Considering we were staying kt penghujung UTP that time. Very secluded. When we nearly reached the pool it was almost 3 am. The pak guards were asking us where are we heading. Tasha said ' Pg mamak pak cik'. Being newbies sgt cuak and skema but want to break rules. haha

We didn't go to the pool. We just head towards the gate. Beside UTP there was this mapley. We sat there for almost an hour. I was about to give up and wanted to go back but Tasha told me.. come on babe, we came this far.

Sneaked into the pool. The funny thing was. I am short and scared of heights. We had to climb up the gate with those sharp small spears. Tasha made it. But i was stuck. At last i jumped to Tasha.

No we did not go skinny dipping (don't even imagine it).It was freezing but we were two happy girls. And we didn't even get caught.

It end up my pants with a hole. hahahahha

Ina and cars

Ina has this sort of chemistry with cars.

Kunci kereta hilang.

In our foundation days we used to 'lepak' and stare at the blank dark sky (see, too many free time those days). Usually it was me, Ina, Iylia and Tasha.
So this one particular day. Ina car keys were missing that night when we were 'lepaking' . Searched all over the place. The grass was too deep and it was dark. Even Wazi and Mirul came to help. Ina offered, who ever found her car keys will be awarded lunch at Chilli's. The next day Taufiq and Fara found it at the second round a bout in utp sparkle reflected by the sunshine.

Car crash and minor accidents... Don't get me start on that.Banyakkkk... from frances.. to.. dante pernah kene ke? hehe

But whatever it is, Ina is still the 'kakak' or 'ketua platoon' that we all sayang.

Thursday, September 4

On my left

Ayuni's bed
On Ayuni's bed:
small pillow
big pillow

all in place

alaaaa x menarik la her bed today. It's always messy. But now its tidy.

see now she's touching my lappie. ish kacau and menyibuk. shooh! gedik.

Wednesday, September 3

I just don't get it

Its this new software my boss asked me to try.
Nintex workflow. Supposedly it is much more easier than sharepoint design (for some of you sharepoint user, you'd know how to create a workflow there).

I think its just a fancy GUI workflow management that is much more complicated to understand than using sharepoint design which is straight forward.

I installed it in my virtual server(sounds geeky enough) and activate it but it seems missing.No where to be found. Or did i not installed it properly?

Everything bout this Nintex thingy is in a section that is suppose to be in Application Management of my virtual server.

I have no idea about this silly thing.My boss is being ridiculous (more like wanting to impress someone big?).No one in this company ever used it even those IT guru.So basically no one knows about this?

So, let the intern try it. Yeah rite. The thing is.... ITS NOT WORKING! and the boss wants to see progression.

Not that i didn't do any research or try and error. I did. But nothing seems to help.Can't ask for help. HELP! I'm doomed and alone.

Tuesday, September 2


Define love.
A feeling that can't be describe with words and very much mysterious which I can't explain why is it hard to be away in means not contacting with that someone in other words losing someone you have feelings for.

Define lonely.
All alone? No company.Lone Ranger.

Define desperate.
In need for something and will do anything to get it.

Define strong.
Tough.Hold on to what i believe in. Hold on to you no matter how much they are against it.

I am not lonely or desperate. But in love perhaps. Why is it hard to understand. Why go against something so beautiful.

Thursday, August 28

I learn..

I learn that sending emails to any manager in an organization should be coated with sugar and not too direct.

I learn that being too direct is disrespectful for managers. But somehow they have the right to be very bitchy and rude (I assume these kind of people are not professional).

I learn that the word NOT is not acceptable. Even when your supervisor told you that you're not going to handle the project anymore.

I learn that everyone in this organization are ass kisser and saving their own ass even if it takes to blame someone else.

I learn that being EMBARRASSED in front the whole department when I was there to say sorry and explain for some stupid misunderstanding really pissed and upsets me (now why would someone treat an intern that way ?. Nama lagi intern. Just about to learn here).

I learn that a department dominated by women makes most of them irrational ,'mengelabah nak mampos' and 'cepat sangat nak melatah' when they have issues with technology that is too advanced for them?

I learn that I have to be humble.

I learn that standing up when I'm not wrong proves that I'm not scared.

I learn that I also can be like ' pegi mampos la.. bkn derang yg sign report aku or grade my intern '

hahahahahahahah. puas hati. sape x puas hati dengan post ni pegi mampos jugak. my blog, suka hati nk tulis ape.

Tuesday, August 26

What i don't often do now..

What I always did but now I can't find the time.

Yes.. the last movie i saw was.... ermmm... The Happening? which wasn't happening. I even missed all the good movies including The Dark Knight. I used to often go for movies but now i just don't know where my time for movies went. Ended up downloading because everyone i know are more advanced (no company?). And still didn't watch what i downloaded.

Movies no time, skip series. I don't even follow up like i used to.

I only do laundry on weekends not weekdays anymore.

Ice Cream.
There's no Syazwan, Ina or Iylia to have ice cream with. So skip that. Eating it alone seems sad.

I bought Nylon. I haven't read the latest issue yet. I'm just done with the last month's issue.

At night like always? Don't expect me to be there. Snoozing.. zzzzz.

Time for Brownie.
I am at home. all i say to her is hye n good night? I don't play or cuddle her that often.

Once or twice a week. Its out of tune so i leave it there. I have no tuner. Not that much time for music. The keyboard also hasn't been touched since the last time i jammed.

This needs discipline.

Papa hasn't paid my membership for the last... i don't know. Its too complicated to think.

Conclusion: I hate work and how tired i am after work and traffic jam.Leaves me with limited time and less friends.

Friday, August 22


I created these on ika's farewell.

Its butter cake with cream cheese icing. I can make it moist chocolate cake too or chocolate chip cake.

The icing took me a very long time to finish because i used 7 colors

But i love baking cupcakes and icing decorating makes me happy~

I also take orders.Just started.Just email me to order at

3 ringgit per cupcake for cream cheese icing. I use only high quality ingredients. Size is the same with wondermilk's but cheaper.

Kawan saya...

Ini kawan saya. Zalikha a.k.a ika. Ika ni suka melatah. Best tau usik dia. Badan je kecik tapi... semangat besar . Saya rapat ngan ika masa form 4. Dia la ceriakan keadaan semasa sedih atau gembira. Kalau dengar org gelak besar2 tu kami la. Ika ni kadang2 pemalu jugak. Kalau keluar ngan saya dan khaleeq mesti kteorg kene orderkn dan tolong bayarkan.Ika ni x lekang(betul ke ayat ni? fail betul BM) dengan senyuman, jadi die disukai ramai. Sebab tu ramai vote dia jadi prom queen (memang prom queen betul. Pakai gaun pengantin ala cinderella). Cukup la kisah masa sekolah. Banyak lagi kalau nak diceritakan. Walaupun saya dan ika study di daerah berlainan tapi masa cuti mesti jumpa dengan nina, leez dan ned. Selalunya pegi dinner. Ber-back packing pon pernah. Tak la sunyi dengar mulut die yang kecoh. Tambah leez memang lagi kecoh haru biru (hehe.. still love you leez!). Baru-baru ni lepas ika tamat diploma. Dia dapat tawaran pegi Indon buat medic. Tercapai juga cita2 dia. Rasanya dia la paling lama study nanti. Harap Ika balik selalu. Tak la jauh sangat tapi rasa lain la jugak tak de budak kecik ni.

Monday, August 11

When i took my life away

Have you ever think what happens when you end your life?
Its called suicide.
I had a thought of it last few days.
Gloomy Sunday (a song) that makes me think of it. You just happen to get depressed after listening to it even tho you are happy before that.
Supposedly when you listen to it and if you are really depressed at that time, you might just jump from a building or cut your wrist till you bleed to death.
Back to my thoughts,
I wonder who would come to my funeral.
Would rose water soak the soil above me?
Will my soul rest in peace?
But i hope that there will be no tears because i am glad to go.
Please put white daisies above my grave. I'll be one happy soul.

Back here.. i think again..
I have so many things to look forward to and perhaps love myself and i should never think about suicide again.I stop the blade from touching my wrist in the middle of the night. Why would i end my life now..

Monday, August 4

Weekend and you're broke

It was a girlish weekend.Not that i wore pink the whole weekend. Ika slept over at my house on Friday. Its been ages since my last slumber party. We stayed up making puding batik and watched memoirs of a geisha and not forgetting endless gossiping.

Nina picked us and Ned up the next day. We planned to watch a movie. But the line was endless at Sunway. We end up going in and out fitting rooms , cam whoring (the four of us happen to dress up nice and pretty that day) and donuts.

Awan was here. With my lappie si kura2.We were tired.So we went for supper near by my house. Thanx so much for making my kura2 lappie fast. Hugs~ Initially we planned for a nice fancy dinner but we're broke.And my dear Awan don't spoil my mood. He told me he was getting me flowers but he couldn't find a florist. o.0

I thought my Sunday will be free. But mama wants to do some shopping. I tagged around. There's a new restaurant at mid valley. Spaghetti and grill. Its a sub of Chilli's. But the food was superb! We ordered 4 meals and shared. All Italian food. Big potion. Advisable to share. The lamb shank was nice (recommended) and kinda cheap for a complete meal.

I never thought i would be so crazy bout a Gucci sun glass till i meet the one that suites me perfectly. Owh.. duit turun la dari langit. haha... And a really nice Coach handbag. It smells good. I'm freaggin' in love with both. Why don't money grow on trees? So mama made a deal with me. If my final result, before i graduate is really good, she'll buy me a Coach handbag. But... its a limited edition.The only one here in Malaysia.. All i could think about now is the sun glass and hand bag...Me want!

I been spending alot.I should save for a Gucci sun glass or that Coach handbag tho i know its impossible. Hold on baby, mama's gonna get you when she have loads of cash. Do you think any one nice enough reading this post would buy me those ? :p

Friday, August 1

They are supercoolawsome

I found out about this duo in my NYLON mag.So i open their myspace and listen to their songs.Awesomely Brit pop. I fell in love. Reminds me of Karen O meets cheerleader. hahahaha

Thursday, July 24

Blush Blush

This was us a year ago before we broke up. And now we're together again which was suprising how much you changed to a better person. And i love you for that. hee~


I felt really tired yesterday.And today my throat hurts. Had to walk all the way to klcc tower 1 today. which was far and... level 59. tak boleh tinggi lg ke? huuuu.. laptop berat sumore, the highest heel that i have and a tight skirt. Good combination for walking long distance. Now my throat isn't getting any better and porridge is all i can accept. Feeling feverish is making me whiny.I want to sleep. zzzzz....wraped in my mum's shawl feels kinda warm.

Wednesday, July 23

Good morning

Breakfast as usual. Fickle la. hummmmm..

Tuesday, July 22

Di manakah orang2 ini?

I miss every one of you.
I miss how close we are in UTP.

Monday, July 14


Not even my birthday. But i got my belated birthday present. wee~ tq syazwan.Present awak sgt comel and useful. Laptop sleeve.. hee. One more thing that made me excited is... my result~ not dean's list. But i'm glad. Scholar x kene tarik. fuh! By the way, this was on Friday. So after i checked my result and was ok with it, me and syazwan went to carl's jr for lunch. Adreen is restricted to shop from now. Weekend was depressing. Need retail terapy. huhu. Spot a nice dress that is far cheaper than WareHouse. but.... i'm broke. *sigh*

Wednesday, July 2

Botol Kosong

Sometimes i wonder why am i so choosy. Sometimes teringin jugak nak ada someone to be happy with. There are choices but don't seem anything would happen and i just refuse to go on a date. I'm not desprate or anything. Kosong... that is how i feel. There's nothing to look forward to. Not even the weekends. macam sedih je bunyi.Kinda kot.I long for someone that i wouldn't have any problems going out with or i don't have to sneak out or get yelled at for going out with that person. I asked my mum and dad what kind of guy that you guys will be okay with if i were to date someone? result is.. dad yelled at me because he thought i was talking about my ex. So that was out of the topic. And now i don't feel like seeing anyone. Ever thought of will i meet anyone? I am so passive now. Gosh i need new friends.

Sunday, June 22

Spring Cleaning

Dusty.. That's how i describe my room. Sort things out since there are too many junk in this room some are not even mine. Boxes.. many boxes. Its fun sorting things out. Each box is special and full with memories. So here i list the boxes:

1. Dated way back in primary school. Its the largest apart from the box full of cards.
-It was special because it contains all the stuff me and Yana used to exchange and all the artsy things we used to make and exchange. More like Best Friends Forever when we were kids.

2. The shoe box with toys
-All the loveable toys i had since i was a baby till i was about 6 or 7 ? But i still kept my soft bunny teddy with rattles. Its 22 yrs old btw. owh and my little pony, 2 of them. gosh i love those. plus some other old toys.

3. High School
-All the trophy and medals. Diaries perhaps. Not that interesting. Just bcoz these things lived during my high School years.

4. 2 boxed of stuff my exs used give me.
- why 2? Bcoz 2 of them gave me good memories and the longest i had a relationship with. One got together with my best friend and the other one is still in good contact with me.

5. A box of cards (a big one)
-Birthday cards, hari raya cards, and good luck cards.. not mine. but the whole family's

6. A box of pictures that didn't get through the family album and unoccupied frames that i got on my birthdays.
- no idea for a birthday present? give frames! Frames are getting over rated. get something else for a present. or they will end up in a box like what i did.

So, now my room is sparkling clean. Being broke is not that bad. At least i get to do something.

Friday, June 13

Balancing with heels

Lately the LRT felt like a can of sardine. Since the petrol price got up.

Unfortunate for me being petite, i had to stand under sweaty armpits and smell the aroma of body odour. Some original perfume huh?

Plus the heels. Walking 1 km from office to station with it. My feet burns like hell.
Don't mind the walking tho (if i had my running shoes on)

Just 2 weeks here.

Apart from work stress n complicated issues.

I'm looking forward for lunch. With Iloi.

My supervisor is not here and i'm exploring this software which is so confusing and lost. Ditch that.

Met so many people that i know since I'm in the middle of KL.

Meeting with 'some people 'who has been gone for quite a while makes things exciting.

Train rides aren't exciting as that tho. Especially with heels..

Wednesday, June 11

It will grow

its just hair. it will grow. blergh!
This is the worst hair cut ever. huhu...
i miss my long hair so badly. i feel like a boy.
Maybe a little wax would help.

Tuesday, June 10

Changing skin

Change everything.My blog and start on a new piece of paper. welcome~ again

cik lanun

My photo
I used to believe that we can live on clouds.

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